Integrity and Honor

When I campaigned for this Office in 2000, I had vowed to restore integrity and honor to a White House that I felt had been tainted by the Clinton years. But ever since the lyin' about WMDs, the torture memo in relation to Abu Ghraib, the investigation into the leaking of a CIA agent's identity, the nominatin' of an old friend for a Supreme Court seat, and especially since the indictment and resignation of Libby, the press and the public has been scrutinizin' the integrity, honor, and ethical conduct of my White House. Well, I'm here to clarify what I mean by those words. Basically, what I meant by integrity and honor is that there would be no oral sex, no abuse of cigars, and no abuse of dresses. As far as I'm concerned, everythin' else is just fair game.