Wow!

Okay, right there that's the difference between Republicans an' Demoncrats, we don't eat our own. Well, 'xcept maybe fer Scotty McClellen. I'd like to eat him out.

. . . um, wait, that din't come out right. Let me try that again.

At least Republicans don't kick one a' their own when their down. 'Xcept maybe fer Scotty McClellen, 'cause I'd sure like ta go down on him.

. . . er . . . I'm jus' hittin' the orange RUBISH POST button on this one.

Why We Can't Let the Dems Win!!!

Here's a perfekt example of why we can't let the Dems win the Whitehouse. If they do, then I'm sure we'll jus' be seein' more of this:

Don't fergit, this happened in Florida, exactly where Barack Obama an' Hillary Clinton both recently spent sum time campaignin', so the connection oughtta be obvious.

Mixed Bag

Ouch! Turns out that even airlines have a better satisfaction ratin' than I do.

On the other hand, I think I found a good way to make some money after I leave office. Can't beat this: I can get paid fer bein' a quitter.

Take a Guess . . .

Can anyone guess what this artifact is? If you wanna know, click here.

Can You Say, "Anger Management"?

Today we have the opposite of Barack's "Sweetie" slip up from the other day.

Hereeeeeee's Billy:

Sweetie?!?

'Parently, Barack called sum reporter "Sweetie." Whuts up with that???

Mississippi--Not My Fault

Okay, so it looks like the Republican party lost another seat in Congress, but it's not my fault, really. I mean, I didn't even campaign fer the guy. If you wanna blame anyone, blame Dick. He went down an' actually campaign'd fer the fella. Or, if you wanna, blame McCain--he's the Republican in the news these days.

Nope, not my fault. I wasn't anywhere near Mississippi. I was at my daughter's weddin'. Heck, I wasn't even drunk--Laura wouldn't let me get anywhere near the booze.

Big Day

Well, here it is, the day my li'l Jenna gets married. Her weddin' day jus' 'bout brings a tear to my eye. I'm jus' so happy, 'cause y'know what that means? It means that there'll probly be an open bar.

Two Items of Interst

Okay, first, a new study (that's right folks, it's scientifical) . . . anyway, a new study shows that conservatives are happier than liberals (heck, I already knew that). But the neat thing is the reason: it's 'cause we're more rational.

Next, accordin' to some news story Ecuador might be passin' some kinda orgasm law. Heck, how cum we never thought a' that?

Ingratitude

Well, how d'ya like them apples?!?

Here we are generous enough an' nice enough to admit that perhaps not everyone in Gitmo really belongs there, so we go an' let some peoples go free from the detainment center. An' then, wouldn't you know it, the peoples we is nice enough to set free then turn aroun' an' call Gitmo the most heinous prison mankind has ever known.

The noive!!!

Top Ten New Hillary Slogans (if I were writin' 'em)

10. "Slings Mud Like a Republican, Votes Like a Democrat"

9. "More Relentless than the Terminator and the Energizer Bunny Combined!"

8. "Chelsea Clinton, Who Wouldn't Want to See Her for Four Years?"

7. "Hillary's Got Game, and It's Scary!"

6. "Married to Bill for over 30 Years--She Can Deal with Congress!"

5. "Vote Hillary, or She'll Kick Your Ass!!!"

4. "Whiskey Shots and Beer Chasers? I'm For Hillary"

3. "The Terrorists? She'll Bust Their Balls!"

2. "Hillary Clinton: One Woman Who Won't Go Down!"


And the number one new Hillary Slogan . . .

1. "She's Got Testicular Fortitude!"